Facing my fears

After a traumatic birth having my first little one, I am now having to face the fact that I am going to have to go through the birth experience again with bambino 2. I must be nuts. The reality of the situation has been brought into sharp focus by my first midwife appt where I have had to relay my medial history including the gory details of my first birth experience. Held it together well…for a while…then there were tears. Even after over 2 years the memories are still raw even though the physical scars no longer are.

Most people don’t want to hear the stories of things going wrong – especially not women who are of an age where they may potentially be pregnant in the future or are pregnant. You don’t want to scare people by telling them what is –  in all reality – a near-death blood bath story but its the truth and it happened to me…and I feel like I’m not meant to talk to anyone about it. Taboo subject.

My other half says that if men had been the ones to give birth the population would have been vastly reduced as men would not put themselves through that again knowing what would happen the second time round.





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