I am 24 weeks pregnant with my third baby. With my first pregnancy I was in my size 12 skinny jeans up to 5 1/2 months and (I now realise was a luxury) pre child was able to go and do nice pregnancy friendly exercise classes whenever I liked – swimming and yoga a few times a week (sighs enviously).
Being quite tall at 5′ 8 I often stand out in a crowd but in my last trimester people would openly make comments about the size of my bump which would drive me insane. “Are you sure it’s not triplets!” they would guffaw. No. I’ve have my scans. It’s not triplets. And it being my first pregnancy I was already anxious about the birth – but every day having people telling you your massive – does start to freak you out worrying about how you will get the baby out.
I wasn’t carrying excessive weight elsewhere – from behind you couldn’t tell I was pregnant – unless you saw me walking with a waddle.
It is strange how people have the right to pass comment on your physical condition like that – they just can’t help themselves.
I can only think it’s like when someone has a massive spot on the end of their nose and in your mind your thinking ‘don’t look at the spot!’ and then say to them “wow that’s a huge zit you have on your beak there!” and feel it’s socially okay to say that without offending them.
Because I don’t believe these people who pass comment are trying to be offensive, they just don’t realise that it is.
My first baby was 9lbs 14oz (your eyes are watering and you are saying ouch just reading those numbers) – a natural birth with only gas and air. So yes, a big baby.
Pregnancy 2 I managed to stay fit as could swim in my lunch hour at work but despite that my bump was large by 6 months and again, regularly, people would feel it was appropriate to pass comment.
I had a bad birth trauma with baby 1 so already had anxiety about giving birth and the baby being even bigger – so to then have people telling you on a daily basis your massive and the baby is going to be huge – this did wonders for my mental health and worrying as you can imagine.
Baby 2 was 9lbs 8 and a half – another big baby – but no birth trauma this time thank goodness.
So here we are at pregnancy 3. I didn’t go back to work after baby 2, so no lunchtime swims, and my family set up means I don’t have as much freedom to go to the pool or yoga classes as I would like. My body is pretty stretched out and muscle tone not as good as it could be…I also had a miscarriage at 3mths last year so the creeping baby weight was never lost moving into this pregnancy. So was a stone heavier starting this pregnancy than with baby 2.
Still in size 12 jeans at 5 1/2 months this time round!? I had to get the maternity wear out whilst still first trimester but was still in size 12 mat trousers until 4 weeks ago so now comfortably a size 14.
The comments about my bump size are starting earlier too, which is already getting me peeved as I think I have months more to endure and it is only going to get worse.
No I am not having twins. And yes, I do know (after having 2 9lb plus babies) that the baby will be big). I don’t need you to keep telling me thanks.
So please, the next time you feel like passing comment on a bump stop yourself. Sensitive, hormonal, emotional, pregnant lady might not just take it as well as you expect but will pick out your most obvious physical foible and throw it back at you.